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Still figuring myself out...
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Dazed & Confused


What I found in the newsletters...

Dazed & Confused




I Could Spend My Life In This Sweet Surrender

Don't Want To Miss A Thing - Pomplamoose (Aerosmith Cover)

I Could Spend My Life In This Sweet Surrender

Inbox, Cleared!


I cleared my e-mail inbox, at last!
Well, what I meant was cleared it of unread newsletters from various sources I've subscribed too.

Here're some interesting things I found:

Love In 45 Seconds


This clip puts together the "Oliver and Bliss couple" scenes I love most.
And of course, the other scenes not involving both of them. ;)

Old School Television Shows

Good times! :)
Watched the 1st episode on youtube. ;)

"I don't feel any pressure right now."


And so goes the infamous answer of a former beauty pageant winner.

But, I did not entitle my post as such for no reasons because in truth, I actually feel like I'm under pressure.

I found this on the internet:


I felt pressured by the "can't wait to see their personal styles on the first day of school!" comment.


I dunno. I just don't think I'm "fashionable enough" (what a silly thing).

I have my style but...I guess it's simple compared to others. :D


I'm excited for my pre-enlistment!

Fashion For Men


Credits to: MensModelStalk

Whip It!

Yesterday night, down to the first hour of the next day, my sister and I-and oh, my brother too,- watched Whip It.

I think I'm in love with Roller Derby (how'd ya spell it?)! Lol.
Hey, I must say, I really like how random Oliver and Bliss are together. The pool scene was perfect of course the movie's end it got me confused how their relationship ended up...
Anyway, the movie's really funny.
I enjoyed it.
I love its soundtrack, the cinematography, the setting, and the costumes! :)



Yes I Walk Around Somehow But You Have Killed Me


You Have Killed Me by Morrissey

Things I Never Told (You)

I never told him...

Okay, so I'm trying to conjure this poem. Lol.
But, I'm still trying to figure out what situation would best fit how the poem would go.
So, I have to make up a story plot first before I go for it.
That poem is "under construction".

Anyway, I was progressive today and reliable! :)
I cleaned our house.
Well, sorta.
I swept the floor, and did a major overhaul at/in our terrace.
I'm proud.


Now my arms are aching due to that little exercise. Lol.

I've adventures to talk about but really, I want to talk about it with someone who talks back so I'm not exactly referring to you my dear blog.

What you'd be hearing is perhaps the 3rd, 4th, or 5th -hand story. ;)
Suck it up.

Last April 17, I was supposedly going to SoFA's event with my sister. She was also going to meet up with a friend of hers who's auditioning for Magic's Junior Jock thing -which I wanted so badly to join but it was so last minute I wasn't able to come-up with the requirements.

We didn't go to the SoFA thing though. We just watched it from afar. Haha!
After waiting for my sister's friend and roaming around Bonifacio High while we're at it, the place we lastly hit was Fully Booked (home sweet home!). My sister and I spent quite a long time listening to cds on the 5th(?) floor.
The Gossip, Foo Fighters, Incubus...and, Kings of Leon.

We went to lower floors to read some books -she read Catching Fire which I'm trying to borrow from my friend who lent me the first installment to the series, The Hunger Games.

I read this 78-page book, The Savage by David Almond.
Here's how I summarized it in my own words. :)

The Savage by David Almond.

It's beautiful.
Perhaps the MOST unusual CHILDREN'S book ever. :))
For realz.

'Cause for a children's book, it's pretty dark. Hahaha!
But I like it.
It gave me goosebumps. That how beautiful it is.
Kasi, though it was bluntly narrated or blah, I felt like there was something deeper between the lines.
Wala lang.
Reading it was magical.

The story's about this young kid who had his father died.
And he was sick of the guidance counselor asking how he feels and telling him to just write down whatever he feels.

But he does write but not what the counselor told him to.
He creates this story about a savage kid.
Who was, SAVAGE.
He didn't know how to speak and he wore chicken feather in his head and he had jeans on with his boxers peeking out a little.
He was topless and filthy and he lived inside a ruined chapel.
He kills people, eats their flesh and buries/throws them inside a deep pit.

The book itself told the stories simultaneously.
Like for the first chapter, it would be the boy narrating his story about the savage kid.
And then it would go back to the "real life" of the boy. And somewhere in that real life of his, he'd feel like continuing the story of the savage kid, so he does.

In the boy's story, he decided to include himself, his sister, this bully, and his mother.
Tas, somewhere along the way, the savage kids meets the bully from afar and he's disgusted by the kid.
But, the savage also sees the boy and his sister and he feels something else.
And he starts to feel something human inside him but he doesn't know just what it is.
So he goes one with his life.

One day, the boy, in his real life gets so pissed at the bully 'cause the bully mocks him even after his father's death.
So the boy writes about the savage kid.
By the way, the boy's name is Blue (I just remembered).
So Blue expresses his anger towards the bully by continuing the Savage Kid's story.

The savage kid decides to "hunt down" the bully. So he gets his axe and smells the air.
The bully has a disgusting smell.
The savage kid arrives at the bully's house and creeps up into his bedroom.
He raises his axe as the bully was sleeping but...he just couldn't do it. He felt something else.
So what he did, he just punched the bully in the nose until it bled and left through the window.

The next day, in Blue's real life, he comes across the bully and sees that he's nose and mouth is swollen.
And he starts to panic and worry.
But Blue tells the bully that he knows what's happened. That HE sent the savage kid to the bully's room to punch him and that.

Then Blue goes home.
He continues the Savage Kid's story and this time, the savage kid goes to their house while their all asleep and he goes into Blue's sister's (Jessica) room.
And the Savage Kid rubs Jessica's eyebrows with his hands, gently.
And he tries to sing to her but all that escapes his mouth are "augh, ugh, ah" because he can't speak.

In real life, Blue's mother goes into Jessica's room to find her dirty -traces of Savage Kid's filth.
And Jessica's saying stuff/words like what the savage kid says.
And Blue starts to question whether the Savage Kid is real.

So one day, he decides to go to the ruined chapel and find out for himself.
When he's inside, he finds the Savage Kid, who seems to be waiting for him too.
The Savage Kid lead Blue further inside and shows him a wall.
A wall with drawings.
A wall where Blue, his FATHER!, his mother, and his sister are drawn.
And in that wall it's like the Savage Kid drew Blue's life just like how Blue wrote the Savage Kid's life.
And they were just bound to meet.

Later in they're meeting, Blue would hear his dead father's voice whisper something to him.
And then he was outside the ruined chapel and it was all over.

And I guess, time moved on...and the story ended.

Oh wait, I remember how the story ended.
Kasi, in the story, his mom knew he was writing a story. (HAHA, story). Tas Blue would sometimes read snippets of it to his mom but he'd keep the rest which are darker in nature or the like.

The real ending of the book didn't stop at Blue's and Savage Kid's meeting.
The ending was when Blue decided to tell his mom about the book.
To tell everyone about the book.

So ayun, there came The Savage Kid by David Almond

Ewan ko. I just really found it beautiful and really meaningful.
Parang, it's like, for the boy, perhaps for the writer if the story's somewhat true to life, it meant something really big.
And that's what I'm happy about...
Hee. :D

Some lines I got:
"He led me further towards the fire, and by the low light of it I saw him face to face like a reflection. And he was just like me, only weirder and wilder and closer to some magic and some darkness and some dreams."

"In some weird way, the sadness helped us to get happy again."

I copy-pasted that from my Facebook message to a friend.
Saves me time from narrating all over again.

By the way, I just completed my medical check-up for this coming school year at UP Health Services.


"Is it so wrong, to crave recognition?"
The Prayer by Bloc Party

Boy Crazy


So I'm all giddy that I finally found out the name of this model I found in Kai Z Feng's flickr.
I saw him before already but never really found out what his name was and...never really tried to find out what it was.

But, I went to Kai Z Feng's flickr once again and came across the same photo.

With my sister's help I discovered his name is Clement Poinas. ;)

Here's the photo that made me melt:

Editor's Pick


I love the new one at Looklet!

And Our Love Could Have Soared

I Still Remember by The Bloc Party

I'm not exactly sure.
My friend and I have this thing for the beautiful kind of sad, the tragic kind of beautiful, the achingly beautiful, the broken, the fragile, yet, while at it, remains beautiful.

I dunno if this is something along those lines.
I don't think so.

It's just, sad. Sad that it's depressing.
The only thing that kept me going until the book's end was that tiny spark of hope within me for the possibility of a happy ending.
All throughout the story was just full of horrible things happening to a fourteen year old boy.
But heck, I was warned by the book's summary at the back of the paperback cover wasn't I? So I shouldn't really complain.
His parents were splitting up, his sister has a some major eating disorder issues, and well, he just decided to disappear somewhere in the middle of it all.
Not literally, figuratively.
He just decided to be invisible and he struggling internally
and I don't know if I was just trying so hard to find myself in the boy
'cause I guess I did, just a little bit.
In the part where he just played in the background, being observant...trying to fix things when in fact he hasn't been living his life.
He was just being passive.
The only part where we aren't the same I guess, is the part when he acknowledges that he's allowed himself to be invisible for quite a long time and it's time to actually live an un-invisible life.

Reminds me, The Perks of Being A Wallflower (Ayna, I beg you to read this).
This and that book have similarities, I must say.
Enough ranting, moving on...

Did the book have a happy ending though?

The ending left too many rooms for possibilities.
But I guess, that spark of hope became something that is a just little bit more than a spark.
Which could leave me at ease at least.

Still, it wasn't an explosion.

"Standing on the edge of safe."
The Con by Tegan and Sara

No Title For This


YES! :))

Kiss, Kiss, Kiss.

Levi's F/W '09


Forever Young


Ripped Slashed Studded Pinned

"Nothing thrills us anymore."
Boring - The Pierces

Screaming Francisco Lachowski!

And We Shone Like A Star And We Blinded Who Stared


A Brief History of Love - The Big Pink

Tonight I Can Write
Pablo Neruda

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

I guess you can say I'm in the mood for emo sad.

I love broken, fragile, tragic things.
Well, beautifully broken, beautifully fragile, beautifully tragic things.

"It's up to you to lend me your heart."
A Brief History of Love - The Big Pink